As I sit here staring at my computer screen wondering what to write, I have a beautiful face looking back at me. I found this photo on my computer today as I was looking for that "right" photo. I don't remember seeing this photo before, as it was one that Jane had taken on her own camera and she had downloaded to my desktop to make room for more.
This beautiful face takes me to a place of wishful thinking. Wishing to go back in time to a place where death wasn't part of my daily thoughts. Wishing I would have known how to save her. Wishing that her sister's didn't have to grow up without their beautiful older sister, who they really never got to know. And, yet with all this time wishing, I still know that my plan was not God's plan.
Because I cannot bring Jane back, I am dedicating the next few months to doing what I think is the next best thing - raising awareness and money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society (LLS) by running a 1/2 marathon. I have two weeks of training "under my belt" so to speak. Some moments I wonder how crazy I have to be to think I can run, then I remember that I am only half crazy as I have decided to run "just" a 1/2 marathon. And, for future reference, please remember when I use the word "run", I do so loosely. As my definition of run likely will include LOTS of walking. But, I am okay with that as it is not my goal to finish first or set any records, it is my goal to complete this race in memory of Jane and others who have died to this nasty disease and in honor of the plethora of others, especially kids who are survivors.
In addition to running the Fargo 1/2 marathon in memory of my angel Jane, I have also decided to run it in honor of three other girls that are Jane's age - Lauren, Kayleen and Lexi. I will introduce you to them in upcoming blog entries. These young ladies inspire me each and every day.
As I work towards raising money for this worthwhile organization, my mentor Katie told me that some of the donations you get will "knock your socks" off, and she is right. I could tell you something amazing about each and every donation I have gotten so far - from the $5 to the $50 donations - each of them tell a different story. But, the one that I want to leave you with tonight is the comment from 9-year-old Lexi. Included with her donation, Lexi said, "I asked my mom to make a donation today, so other kids could say they are survivors too. Let's keep fighting!"
Amen! Let's keep fighting so other kids can be survivors too!
Thank you for all the donations, words of support and prayers. Together, we can help make Jane's dream of finding a cure for cancer come true!
If you would like to read Jane's story, please check out her Caring Bridge site that was started at the beginning of her diagnosis and is still updated periodically. You can reach that site at: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/janefiemeyer
After Jane's death, I started a blog to journal how we try to move on after her death. I update that blog "as the spirit" moves me. In a way, it's my therapy. The blog can be found at: http://janetheprincesswarrior.blogspot.com.
Welcome to my Team In Training Fundraising and Training Blog and thank you for taking the time to read about an exciting endeavor I've committed to this spring!
For those of you that don't already know, I am training to participate in my FIRST ½ marathon! Some may think I am crazy, but I think I am only HALF crazy.
I have decided to run a ½ marathon to honor the life of a very beautiful girl. On September 6, 2012, Jane, my beautiful 8-year-old daughter, became an angel in heaven. Jane had fought a hard fight with Leukemia and sadly after just 13 months, the bully won. No matter how hard the days got or how sick the medicine made her, Jane stayed positive and always tried to smile. Running 13.1 miles is definitely a challenge, but with Jane as my honored teammate it’s a challenge I am willing to overcome. When the trainings get tough or the miles get long, it will be my memories of Jane that keep me pressing forward. Jane never, ever gave up and as her mom I feel I owe it to her to put the same effort into this race and this opportunity.
The Fargo Marathon is May 18, 2013 and I will run/walk 13.1 miles as a member of The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's (LLS) Team In Training (TNT).
The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society is a non-profit organization with one goal in mind – to cure blood cancer and improve the quality of life of patients and their families. Research funded by LLS has led or contributed to advances such as chemotherapy and bone marrow and stem cell transplantation. In addition to research, LLS supports cancer education, advocacy, and patient services. As part of the team, I am raising funds to help stop blood cancer from taking more lives and to find a cure.
It makes my heart hurt to think about the statistics. Did you know that every 4 minutes, someone, like Jane, is diagnosed with a blood cancer in the forms of leukemia, lymphoma, Hodgkin's disease or myeloma? Every 10 minutes, someone, like my beautiful Angel Jane, will lose their battle with a blood cancer. The good news is that the survival rates for blood cancers have more than doubled since 1970. This would not be possible without the funds raised by LLS.
I have decided that when training seems too impossible, or the thought of running 13.1 miles is too much to bear, I will think of Jane, my honored teammate, and press on. I have set my goal very high because I am making it my mission to raise as much money as I can to fight this horrible disease. It has become personal now. I have watched Jane struggled through the disease. But, despite all the pain her body was in, Jane rarely complained and it seemed she always kept a smile on her face. She was an amazing little girl and it is my honor to run for her.
I’m asking you to please consider making a donation to support my participation in Team In Training and help advance LLS's mission. No donation is too great or small. You can donate with Visa or MasterCard here on my site or you can send your check or cash donation to me in the mail (made out to LLS). For every dollar I raise, 76 cents goes back to LLS. Your donation is tax deductible (Tax ID # 13-5644916) and it would mean a lot for me to have your support.
If you are unable to contribute financially at this time, I ask that you keep me and all involved in The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society in your prayers. That, too, will make a huge difference.
Thank you so much for your support!
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The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society® (LLS) is a global leader in the fight against cancer. The LLS mission: Cure leukemia, lymphoma, Hodgkin's disease and myeloma, and improve the quality of life of patients and their families. LLS funds lifesaving blood cancer research around the world, provides free information and support services, and is the voice for all blood cancer patients seeking access to quality, affordable, coordinated care. The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society is a 501(c)(3) organization, and all monetary donations are tax deductible to the fullest extent allowed by tax laws. Please check with your financial advisor if you have more questions.